The Ridiculous is the Sublime: Be selfish people and give thanks

(‘The Ridiculous is the Sublime’ is penned by Art McGregor. McGregor founded the German Village Media Family of Networks on Sept. 21, 2006. He now writes for "Blog on the Run." You can read him here every Thursday. E-mail him at artmcgregor@hotmail.com.)

For many years at Thanksgiving (since "the days of the pilgrims" you might say), my family celebrated Thanksgiving at St. Christine's in Youngstown, Ohio. We'd gather at about 1 p.m. and begin leaving around 4 p.m. From there we'd go to other relatives on the north side of Youngstown and that part of the visit usually wasn't much fun. They had a dog. I wasn't ever hungry. I would have rather have been at home. I'm not sure why I'd rather be at home because that just consisted of sitting on the couch and missing a Thursday night out at like Brothers.

Fun happened at St. Christines on the city's west side. The fact that the church is located on the west side matters nothing in the telling of the story. That's Fact 1.

St. Christine's (established in 1954) had a decent-sized gymnasium with a balcony and concession stand area. Lots of great hide-and-go seek places back there as well as aluminum cans of pop that easily were steal-able. My grandma worked at the school so the K-8 building served as a K9-free defacto growing-up environment.

When not hoisting up the shit, we'd shoot hoops after school and sometimes play wiffleball or toss around the football. All games usually ended in either fighting or crying. Lots of controversy. One game ended when I we broke the scoreboard with a baseball and another when I threw a pass that Kevin didn't catch and it broke a giant statue of The Virgin Mother Mary. We lied about that one. Lie lasted about two minutes before the crying and fighting began. Early sexual experience usually broke the same way.

It's how everything ended.

I celebrated my last Thanksgiving there in 2005. I actually remember the day well because I was writing a story on Finland's national women's Olympic hockey team and had to talk to someone in Finland on the phone. [Comment on how that really happened.]

I didn't miss the annual tradition. The dinner (at 2 p.m.) included about 30 guests. We'd sit in a circle and say what we're thankful for. My dad absolutely hated the exercise. Then again, he won't get communion unless he takes confession and still wishes they said mass in Latin.

I didn't mind it. We have some sappy folks in my family who recalled heartwarming recollections (not that we needed it any warmer ... gym-time temperature was about 80 degrees. My grandma was cold blooded.), some lame younger cousins that would just say "family," and people like me who'd mesh the day's pertinent current events and my own self-serving interests. Of the 30, my dad and I were about the only Republicans in the audience. I liked Thanksgiving 2004. We're not doing it this year.

That's a shame. I have something good I'd like to share.

I had a meeting at a hospital this morning. I pulled into the parking garage and noticed something about all the cars other them sporting Ohio plates and four wheels. Most had some sticker of a ribbon on them.

I have never had reason to place a sticker of a ribbon on my car. I'm thankful for that. I don't know anyone off at war. (Not counting the ongoing war between my buddy McGinley and The Godfather who always seem to be at war with each other in a "who can be funnier" competition.) I don't know anyone with any sort of disease. I don't know anyone dying of something incurable. None of my family members ever had childhood cancer. I do know someone with a transplanted organ but that's something you represent on a driver's license.

I'm an odd bird. I don't really believe in the existence of a God but remain a staunch conservative. I refuse to ever say I'll pray for someone (no matter how sympathetic the cause) because I believe prayer serves no purpose. I spent nine years in a Catholic school and have zero problems with the Catholic church or any other religious organization. It sickens me how the mainstream media has painted religious folks to be "kooks" while ignoring left-wing idiots who criticize religious "homophobic" black Christians. (See the reason for the passage of Prop 8 in California.)

But I do believe in thanks.

I'm lazy. Real lazy. So perhaps it's fitting that I pick something to be thankful for that's rather easy.

We all should be thankful for our health. But don't sit around and "thank God" for it or whatever. What good does that do? Instead use it to lift your own spirits. I've found that when I feel better about myself, I am better able to positively influence the lives of those around me.

It's OK to be selfish every now and then. Especially around Thanksgiving. Those people with the ribbons on their cars need it to help stay tied together.

Comments

[Goose]

It's interesting that you're sickened by the negative portrayal of religious kooks while the left-wing idiots are up in arms over the passage of Prop 8. The reason "left-wingers" are up in arms (along with a few right-wing kooks), is that for any relgious group to preach non-tolerance is hypocritical. The religious zealots of today love the old testament, but despite the WWJD bracelets, we don't see a lot of his teachings in action!

In the case of the Mormons who were the big backers of Prop 8, it's bordering on the sublime that a group so reviled for their polygamist ways would dare to preach a certain lifestyle to another. As for black christians being homophobic, I guess the proof is in the voting!

G.